George Washington's Rules of Civility

George Washington’s Rules of Civility, Complete with the Original French text and New French-to-English translations / by John T. Phillips, II. – 4th, Collector’s Classic Ed., Goose Creek Productions, Virginia Beach, Virginia, 2003

The Rules of Civility, in the form that George Washington learned them in 1745 [at age 13], follows maxims set out in a 1595 French manuscript titled Bien-s[e]ance de la Conversation entre les Hommes, (“Good Manners in Conversation among Men”). Bien-s[e]ance, which was generated by the Pensionnaires of the Jesuit College of La Fl[e]che, … the reorganized elaboration of an earlier Italian book, Il Galateo. / Around 1552, scholar and Catholic cleric Giovanni della Casa authored Il Galateo, a courtesy book that was eventually published after his death 1556. (Introduction, 7)

During the period of della Casa’s ascendancy in the church, Paul III founded the Society of Jesus (“Jesuits”), one of the Catholic responses to the then-new, surging Protestant Reformation. (8)

By the end of the 16th Century, Jesuits were educating the children of the nobility all over Continental Europe, … (8)

The first English version of the rules of civility, a translation of della Casa’s Il Galateo titled A Treatise of Maners, was printed in London in 1576. Similarly, two decades after its publication in Latin, P[e]rin’s Les Maximes was translated into English and appeared in London in 1641, titled Youth’s Behaviour, or Decency in Conversation amongst men. … A copy of Youth’s Behaviour would be utilized by George Washington’s teacher as his text for the rules. (9)

A fair linguistic analysis leads one to conclude that George’s instruction in the rules incorporated English translations of French phrases. To his embarrassment as an adult, George Washington never learned French. George’s instructor evidently [12] possessed a fundamental knowledge of the French maxims but used Hawkins as his lecture guide. (12-13)

[2d] When in company, put not your hands to any part of the body that is not usually discovered. (19)

[4th] In the presence of others, sing not to yourself with a humming noise; nor drum with your fingers or feet. / note: In 1552, Giovanni della Casa advises his readers not to indulge in “humming to oneself, or tapping one’s fingers, or moving one’s leg to and fro,” because these are the actions of an inconsiderate person. [Galateo, Chap. 6] (20)

[9th] Spit not in the fire, nor stoop low before it. Neither put your hands into the flames to warm them, nor set your feet on the fire, especially if there be meat before it. (24), It is a crude action to spit in the fireplace, to hold the hands too close to the flame in warming them, or to crouch in front of the fire as if sitting on the ground; if something is being cooked on the fire, do not turn your back to the fire and do not approach it closer than others—for these are the privileges of persons of rank. When there is a need for stirring the fire, putting wood on or pulling or lifting it, this is the job of the person who has the general superintendence of those things. (English translation of the Middle French. Pg 26)

[10th] When you sit down, keep your feet firm on the ground and even, without putting one foot on the other or crossing them. (26)

[12th] Roll not the eyes, lift not one eyebrow higher than the other. Wry not the mouth, … (27)

[15th] Keep nails clean and shot, and your hands and teeth clean, yet without showing any concern for them. (30)

[23d] When you see a crime punished, you may be inwardly pleased; but always show pity to the suffering offender. (36)

[28th] If anyone comes to speak to you while you are sitting, stand up although he be your inferiour. And when you present seats, let it be to every one according to his degree. (41)

[29th] When you meet with one of greater quality than yourself, stop and retire, especially if it be at a door or any straight place, to give way for him to pass. (42)

[30th] In walking, the highest place in most countries seems to be on the right hand. Therefore, place yourself on the left of him whom you desire to honour; but if three walk together the middle place is the most honourable. The wall is usually given to the most worthy if two walk together. (44)

[31st] If any one person far surpasses others, either in age, estate, or merit, yet would give his pace to one meaner than himself, whether in his own house or elsewhere, the lesser one ought not to accept it. So as not to appear uncivil, the superior ought not to offer it [the preference or place of honor] above once or twice. (46)

[35th] Let your discourse with men of business be short and comprehensive. / …one should cut matters short with men of business, and not put one’s fine flowerets under their nose. One should spare them and make himself understood rather by looks than by words. (51)

[36th] Artificers and persons of low degree ought not to use many ceremonies to Lords, or others of high degree, but respect and highly honour them. (51)

[37th] In speaking to men of quality, do not lean, nor look them full in the face, nor approach too near them. At least keep a full pace from them. / In speaking to persons of quality, do not lean your body on anything; do not raise your eyes to their face; [52] do not go too near them, and manage to keep a full step in distance. (52-53)

[38th] In visiting the sick, do not presently play the physician if you be not knowing therein. (53)

[40th] Strive not with your superiors in argument, but always submit your judgment to others with modesty. / Strive not with thy superiors, in argument or discourse, but always submit thy opinions to their riper judgment, with modesty (since the possibility of erring doth rather accompany green more than gray hairs). (55)

[47th] … if you deliver anything witty or pleasant, abstain from laughing thereat yourself. (60)

[55th] Eat not in the streets, nor in ye house, out of season. [68] Never walk on the roads while eating, whether alone or in company, especially amid the crowd in a town. Do not sit down to eat, even in your own house, out of the normal meal times; at least abstain from it in the presence of others. (68-69)

[62d] Tell not your dreams, but to your intimate friends. [74] / Never share your dreams with anyone but your confidants, but then only to profit by their interpretations; taking good care not to put the least belief in it. (74-75)

[69th] If two contend together, take not the part of either unconstrained; and be not obstinate in your opinion. In things to which you are indifferent, be a part of the major side. (79)

[78th] Make no comparisons, and if any of the company be commended for any brave act of [sic – or] virtue, commend not another for the same. / … Abstain from drawing comparisons between different persons and, if anyone is praised for a good action, or for his virtue, do not praise another for the same. For all comparisons are odious. / Evidently, George Washington mistakenly wrote the “brave act of virtue” phrase into his MS version of the Rules. The distinction between virtuous and brave acts, made clear in older versions of the Rules, was somehow confused in translation. A substantial number of the Rules suggest that considerate and thoughtful restraint (rather than action) is often the appropriate course for a virtuous, civil person. (89)

[88th] Be not tedious in discourse; make not many digressions; nor repeat often the same manner of discourse. / Do not take a year in your preface, or in certain long apologies or ceremonies, such as: “Pardon me Sir, if I do not know how to express myself sufficiently well, &c.; nevertheless in order to obey you, &c. …,” and other similarly tedious and irritating circumlocutions. But, enter promptly on the subject as far as possible, with moderate boldness, then continue to the end without hesitation. Do not be long-winded; avoid digressions; do not repeat the same expression often. / Giovanni della Casa counsels that well-mannered men guard against speaking too much, “especially if they know little,” order to “ease rather than obstruct other people’s wishes.” [Galateo, Chap. 24] (96)

[92nd] Take no salt, nor cut bread, when your knife is greasy. / In taking salt, be careful that the knife is not greasy. When necessary, your knife or fork may with propriety be cleaned on a piece of bread—or, as is done in some places, with the napkin—but it must never be wiped on the whole loaf. (100)

[95th] Put not your meat to your mouth with your knife in your hand; neither spit forth the stones of any fruit pie upon a dish, nor cast anything under the table. / Do not carry a morsel to your mouth, with you knife in your hand, in the style of the uncouth. [102] It is not good manners to spit out the kernels of prunes, cherries or anything of the kind on your plate…but…they should be decently collected from the mouth in the left hand and placed on the edge of the plate. …Bones, peel, wine and the like should not be thrown under the table… (102-103)

[96th] It is unbecoming to stoop much into one’s meat. Keep your fingers clean and, when foul, wipe them on a corner of your table napkin. [103] Do not clean your hands on a loaf. If your hands are very greasy, you might partly clean them on a bit of bread you are about to eat, then on your napkin, so as not to soil the latter too much. This will rarely happen if you know how to use both the spoon and fork in the most genteel manner. You should not lick your fingers, and certainly do not such them with a loud noise. (103-104)

[98th] Drink not, nor talk, with your mouth full, Neither gaze about while you are drinking. [105]

[103d] Lay not your arm, but only rest your hand on the edge of the table. (110)

[109th] Let your recreations be manful, and not sinful. / Let thy recreations be manful not sinful. There is a great vanity in the baiting of beasts. The bears and bulls lived quietly enough before the fall; it as our sin that set them together by the ears. Rejoice not therefore to see them fight, for that would be to glory in thy shame. [Hawkins, VII-App.] (115)